


Pagan's Untold Story

by Amyole



Category: Gundam Wing
Genre: F/M, Gen, Pre-Series, Romefeller, Sanc Kingdom
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-30
Packaged: 2018-07-10 19:18:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 18,296
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7001998
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amyole/pseuds/Amyole
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ten year anniversary! I posted this story in May 2006, and it's one of my favorites that I've written. Hopefully, you enjoy it, too.</p><p>Mrs. Darlian and Pagan reminisce about the old days. Pagan remembers his part in the fall of the Sanc Kingdom.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'll be tweaking the second part to make it fit with a new fic idea I have, but I think the first part should be fine as is. I would love to delve more into it, actually, but sadly, I do not have the time at the moment.
> 
> Also, this was written before Frozen Teardrop, and I haven't read it at all (just heard whispers), so I have no idea exactly how much is contradicting with FT. I know my Katrina Peacecraft is completely different.

_"... I am announcing the elimination of all national borders. These borders have been the cause of wars around the world. I declare there is one nation: the world nation."_

She watched the end of Relena's speech and shook her head. She closed her eyes as she took another sip of wine. It was very quiet in the house now that she was the only one left, so it surprised her greatly when she heard the door click open (all the servants were gone for the night). Still, she did not open her eyes until she heard her "guest" take a seat in the chair next to hers. When she looked, she saw it was the old butler, Pagan, and he was pouring himself a glass of wine. She did her best to hide her sneer. She thought she had been rid of him for good. He had never been a good butler, for he never took any orders from herself or her late husband. He only did the things which his precious "Miss Relena" asked of him.  
     "I thought you said you'd stay by her side," she said more nastily than she had originally intended.  
     He took a moment to sip his drink, and she could see the noble heritage peaking through. "Dermail's granddaughter took her. I was away with the other girls. I never had a chance to stop her before she left, and once she was on his property, I of course couldn't get her. You know what would happen if I should step anywhere near Dermail—the same would happen to you." She stiffened a little at the allusion to her past. "Yes, you do know what would happen."  
     "No, we cannot get her now," she agreed. "We cannot even contact her now. If Dermail found us, we're as good as dead. He hates traitors even more than he hates pacifists."  
     "Relena is a smart girl. She should be safe there. She doesn't know anything, so she can't leak anything, and Dermail doesn't know she's connected to us. She'll be safe," he comforted as much as he dared.  
     "You never told her? You never told her anything."  
     "She's better off not knowing. You and your 'husband' should have never told her you were her adopted parents. She was better off believing she's a Darlian."  
     " _Your_ ways haven't worked so well either," she retorted.  
     "They've kept her safe all this time."  
     "Well, your methods got everyone into this situation in the first place."  
     "No," he said through gritted teeth. "I recall a certain Romefeller spy of the female persuasion helped bring about the downfall of the kingdom."  
     "That female spy was only sent because the old _male_ spy failed!"  
     They sat in silence. Drinking the wine in hopes to calm their flared tempers, they ended up nursing their anger and hurt egos. Pagan poured himself yet another glass of wine; they both stared straight ahead, blankly at the television screen. After some time, Mrs. Darlian finally said (in a rather quiet voice): "It wasn't my fault. I remember _that_ much distinctly."  
     " _I_ have the better memory between the two of us," he countered lightly. "You were young. You were still having fun back then. I, on the other hand, was quite the adult. I saw things much clearer than you, I paid closer attention and caught more details than you, and I had the wisdom to know to burn the details into my mind. You were too young to do such things." That was the closest she would ever get to a compliment from him, so she allowed him to continue without interruption. "Of course, as a spy, it was also my job to keep an eye out for such details. I have done my job long enough; you were new. I knew what to look out for and what to pay attention to."  
     "If you know what happened so clearly, then," she said, "please explain it to me—since I apparently don't remember."  
     Most of his smirk was hidden beneath his mustache, but he nodded and complied.

* * *

It will take too long to start at the very beginning. I'll start in AC 170 and summarize the first couple years as quickly as I can. King Nicolo Peacecraft was a wise and just ruler. He was heavily inspired by Heero Yuy who was in the colonies making trouble with his unification and Total Pacifism ideas. Peacecraft adopted his ideals and tried to implement them on Earth. Both were a threat to the Alliance and to Romefeller. The colonies were rough and unruly; it would be easy to take out Yuy by way of a secret assassin and to have everyone accept it (which happened five years later). Peacecraft would be harder. He was a strong member of Romefeller and a beloved king. He could not be taken out by an assassin so easily. Revenge would be wanted, and there were many others who would carry on Peacecraft's torch. His ideas (while originally Yuy's, on Earth they were given full credit to Peacecraft) had already spread to other countries. The Alliance and the Foundation needed a spy to bring down the country and to destroy the Peacecrafts from the inside so that when they were swept away, no one would be shocked, and everyone would accept it.  
     Thus, they came to me. I was a noble of lower rank, so while I was a member of Romefeller, no one knew who I was, and I could infiltrate. My children were basically grown, and my wife had died some years earlier. Dermail personally gave me the assignment. That says something about how grave they found the situation. He did not tell me what to do, but he made it quite clear.  
     The Peacecrafts were very trusting. They let me into their kingdom without too much suspicion. As any nobleman, I kept my hands clean of any dirty work. Instead, Romefeller gave me a team of professionals; they reported directly to me (and probably indirectly to Dermail). Slowly but surely, the heirs of the Sanc Kingdom died. All of Peacecraft's children and grandchildren died, and no one suspected foul play. A nasty disease swept through the kingdom, and other accidents also helped take down the others. By AC 172, all heirs were gone, one way or another. Queen Peacecraft was a little harder. She was careful to stay away from the diseased areas, and she was old enough that she never did anything adventurous. As an alternative, she had to be poisoned. There's a certain poison where if you put trace amounts of it in a drink and a person drinks small amounts over a long period of time, a fatal dose can be given one day, and the doctors never know it's poison. They label it as a heart attack.  
     Eventually, King Peacecraft became the sole survivor of his family. He had no heirs left, and his partner was gone. He grieved, and the country grieved with him. However, he could not grieve for long. His advisors soon had to approach him.  
     "Your Majesty, we are all grieving with you. It is a loss for us, too," one of his advisors said with sympathy. "Your children were like our own siblings, your grandchildren like our own, and your wife was such a wonderful woman. It will be very hard not to miss her. She was such a charming and caring woman. She loved each of us just as you do. How could someone _**not**_ miss that?"  
     Nicolo nodded, touched but clearly not stupid. "Yes, George, I know she and the others will be much missed." He breathed a heavy (almost wet) sigh. "I sense 'however' coming, though. What is it?"  
     George hated confrontation. He was a pacifist only because of cowardice. He sputtered and tried to think of a way to explain the situation delicately.  
     Luckily for him, Winston spoke up, "Sire, we all are grieving with you, but as your advisors, we must also look at our situation objectively. The kingdom is now without an heir. Forgive me, but you're not a young man anymore. Unless you name your nephew Victor as heir..."—"No! Never!"—"That is what I thought. Our only other option is marriage. You need to get married and have more heirs, or Victor and the Romefeller Foundation through the Alliance will gain control of this kingdom. It is an emotional time, but we must not let our grief blind us and keep us from what needs to be done."  
     The others mumbled their agreement to Winston's view, I sat in the back keeping my mouth shut, and we all kept our eyes on the king, waiting to see what he would say. He took a moment, thinking on the subject very carefully. In the end, he said he needed more time to think on the matter, this subject required plenty of cautious thinking, and he did not want to be rushed into a decision there and then. Everyone agreed and understood, and the matter was tucked away for a short time.

"What are your thoughts on the subject?" the king asked of me during our next fencing match. Romefeller placed a high importance on fencing, so I had much better training and skill than his other, native courtiers. I gave him a challenge, never simply letting him win.  
     "It's quite practical. You are at least my age, sire, and I would have a hard time producing another line of heirs. The sooner you start, the better foundation you will have," I explained.  
     "To go on and start a new life would be an affront to my wife. I could never live with myself, moving on as if she meant nothing to me except a means to continue my line, as if she were only here to produce my heirs," he said, advancing on me.  
     "An affront?" I scoffed, blocking his thrust. "Everyone knows the decisions a king must make. They will know this second wife is really the one just to continue a line."  
     He frowned, troubled by this. "I don't think I like the idea of a loveless marriage. I won't marry some maiden _just_ to make more heirs."  
     "Can you live with your nephew taking over the kingdom?" I inquired, taking a step toward him. He hesitated, so I continued. "Could your wife have lived with your nephew inheriting the kingdom?"  
     "No, she could not have," he answered gruffly. "She would rather have had me divorce her and marry another with sons already than to let Victor take over. She was willing to make any sacrifice for Total Pacifism, just as am I."  
     "Then make the sacrifice now," I urged. "The Queen, God rest her soul, would have wanted it; you just admitted it. This is the time when the country is at its weakest! The Alliance could strike at any moment! You need to show you're still strong, you're still solid. A wife and more heirs will demonstrate that. You cannot think only of yourself and your family. You have to put the rest of the country first; they need a new queen and more heirs. Do not let Total Pacifism die with your family. Continue it."  
     He parried and blocked my attacks as he contemplated this, and he appeared to be in deep thought. It always amazed me how he took my advice merely because I had excellent skills in swordsmanship.  
     " _I_ might be able to make that sacrifice, but how can I expect a young maiden to do the same? My new wife will be young, I know, and she will not know everything she is sacrificing. I may come to care for this young lady, but I will never love her, not like I loved my wife. How can I ask her to give everything up for an ideal she can barely think of? How can I ask her to sacrifice these things for a husband who will never love her as a husband should?"  
     "As you said, she'll be young. Do you think this woman will care about anything once she holds her first child? Young brides only care for babies. Young mothers are wrapped up in their babies. You will make her the happiest woman on Earth to make her a queen and a mother. She will be young enough not to care for love. That will come in time as you say. Your new queen will not help you govern as your wife did, but she will serve her purpose—knowing full well what her purpose is, and all sides will be content."  
     "All sides but the Alliance and Romefeller," Nicolo smirked as I landed the winning blow. "You win, Pagan. You've convinced me."  
     "Surely your wise advisors did that."  
     "I leave it up to you to find my wife. You're the only one I trust."

I set to my task very diligently. Though I led the court to believe I was irritated with having to be on the selection committee (comprised of a mixture of noblemen and senators), I was quite pleased. I was already in the king's confidence; I was changing him little by little even though no one saw it yet. I knew despite his grief and thoughts, he would also take in his new wife by the time we found one (for I knew finding a wife—a new queen—would take some time). If I could ensure a young unknown maiden from Romefeller became the next queen, the king would change even more.  
     "We have to be very careful. Romefeller could send in spies at any moment now; they want this country to fail," asserted Winston at the first committee meeting. I managed to hold back my snort.  
     "How do we know a spy isn't already in our midst?" I put out, looking around the room furtively as the others did.  
     "No!" Winston declared, "We will _not_ start suspecting each other as well. Romefeller wants us unstable. Whether through spies or causing us to fall into suspicion, I doubt they care. Now. All in this room have been present for years. I believe we can safely rule ourselves out. If you must be suspicious, look at those who've recently entered the kingdom, but do not let your uncertainties rule you. We need to stay focused on our mission. We must find a queen to bring stability to the kingdom." The others muttered in agreement, and the matter was put to rest for the time being.  
     "How shall we go about to find a queen?" asked one man.  
     "We need nominations. This can be no beauty pageant. We need reliable people to find out suitable women and to nominate them for our review. These agents can sift through the hundreds, perhaps even thousands, of potential brides and narrow down the candidates so that we can evaluate only the best ones. It will save a lot of time for us and provide a filter so that we do not have to look for fakes in each contestant," another man, Aderton Cohen, explained. I was quite relieved not to have to make the suggestion.  
     "And who do you suggest we use as 'agents'?" I inquired.  
     "I've made a list," Aderton said and produced a piece of paper from his inside pocket of his jacket. The others gathered around it as we all inspected the names. I noticed instantly that half on the list were in the room, including myself, but I allowed Winston to bring this up.  
     "I see you only want to save time for half of us," Winston joked, laughing boisterously. Quite a few others joined him. "You seem to place great faith in us."  
     "The king has done that, my friend," Aderton said. "The king trusts all on the list, and they are close enough to him that I believe they are the best qualified to find his new wife. They know who will get along with him, and they know who will compliment him as the future queen. Does anyone disagree?"  
     There was some discussion, but in the end, everyone agreed to Aderton's plan and to his list. Then everyone had to decide how many nominations each man could make and which regions each should search. Ironically (at least to me), this took the most time.  
     "They cannot nominate too many people. Else, why would we have them weed out some to begin with?"  
     "We cannot expect them each to narrow it down to just one person either. If one man should find two excellent women, should he be forced to pick a queen right then and there? Another man at the same time could find _no_ woman who would do a good job, but he would still be expected to bring one back. Should he then pick some woman who he knows could not handle the responsibility?"  
     "Any woman like that would be caught by us in a heartbeat, Mitchell. And, if that were the case, why doesn't the first man just give one of his nominees to the second? All would be taken care of then."  
     "That woman could learn he finds her unworthy and thus set on a quest to fool us, though, I agree, it would be hard. The possibility is still there, and we mustn't be too arrogant as to think we cannot be fooled. As for the second matter, what if the first man finds _three_ women, and only one man has found none? Or, perhaps, two men find no woman worthy, and the first still only has one. We also cannot expect things to work out so cleanly and perfectly."  
     "Then have each bring forth two."  
     "Exactly two, or at most two?"  
     "From Mitchell's point of view, at most two."  
     "I say, each man can bring at most five."  
     "Five? Five is too much!"  
     "Far too much!"  
     "We'll be swamped for years! The king could die before we choose his new queen."  
     " _We_ could die before we choose a new queen, gentlemen."  
     "We cannot set limits before we know the regions each man will cover."  
     "Oh? And why do you say that, Matthew?" asked Winston.  
     "I submit that each man will have a better time at finding potential brides in different regions. Carlton knows Greece very well, and I'm sure he could find an abundant number of worthy young ladies—as well as knowing which tricks they use. However, he may not be able to find nearly as many women if he were sent to, say, Bavaria. He could also be tricked more easily, not knowing the women and culture there as well as he knows Greece. No, I say that we cannot make limits on the number of nominees until we have decided on the territory."  
     "Very interesting idea, Matthew," Winston complimented, stroking his chin. He looked about the room expectantly. "Well? What does everyone say?"  
     At this point, the lot fell into much more discussion and argument. Each felt he knew exactly where each man should go, and each also felt he knew the maximum number of nominees. I cannot remember the exact words exchanged there, but it is quite boring and will only slow down the story. If you have ever heard politicians arguing, you know what the room sounded like for the next few days. In the end, my region managed to be my family's territory and our neighbors. I knew I would have no problems finding a bride.

"Papa!" my youngest child called out as she ran over to greet me. It was quite the surprise for everyone. They knew my mission and knew we could not have any contact at all. When I returned to search for a queen, I had not been able to tell them of it, nor would I be able to stay with them, lest a member of Sanc discover me. Still, I took a few minutes to check up on my children. My two youngest were still living at home, and I longed to see them after being away for nearly five years.  
     "Oletia!" I cried as I embraced her warmly. She was always a caring child.  
     "It's good to see you, Papa," my son said, hugging me as well. I could see he held back tears.  
     "Tell me everything. I don't have much time, and I'm not sure if I'll be able to see you again before I must leave," I told them. We had lunch at the house, and they tried to condense the last few years into five minute segments so that each would have the chance to speak and so that we could eat as well. Oletia did not do much eating, though. She wanted to make sure to tell me everything she could, and I'm sure she felt she could eat at another time. While my youngest relayed their lives to me, a young lady entered the house. She seemed to know the servants and shared small talk with the maids as she put up her shawl and hat. However, she was not one of them, and from her milky skin and conditioned hair, I knew she was a member of Romefeller.  
     "Who is that young woman?" I asked my children. They turned to look and faced me again nonchalantly.  
     "Why, that's only Katrina," Oletia reported.  
     "I assume you two would have the good manners to greet her if she were a guest of yours," I chastised for good measure. "Why is she here then?"  
     "I suspect she's here for Ethan," my son explained. "He's not here yet, so I guess she's just going to start without him in the study."  
     "She's a friend of your brothers then," I concluded, silently cursing Ethan for getting involved with her.  
     "Not like you're thinking, Papa," assured Oletia. "Katrina is the younger sister of Julia Sprengelmeyer. You remember her, right?" I nodded. Julia was a childhood friend of Ethan, but times had been hectic back then, and I had not gotten to know the girl well. "It's her birthday coming up, and with her husband gone off to war, Ethan and Katrina felt they should give her a special party. You know, to cheer her up and whatnot. It's a surprise party, so they have to make all the plans here."  
     My children continued talking, but I did not pay much attention. Oh, how I now wish I had! I had many opportunities later to speak with Katrina, but I had just found the future queen. I wasted my time with my children because I found a young maiden to fulfill my needs. I watched Katrina from the table as much as I could without leaning in my chair or any other blatant signs. I do not think they noticed much, and I soon had to say goodbye to my loving children.  
     It took a few days, but I was able to meet Katrina Sprengelmeyer without my children knowing. I already knew a little of her family, and in the days between seeing her and meeting with her, I was able to learn more. I knew by then that she was the perfect candidate. The family was small and insignificant in the whole of Romefeller, but they had good strong ties to many members. She was the younger daughter of the family with two brothers ahead of her. She had no reason to believe she could inherit anything from her family. She had to know that her wealth depended on whom she married. She would be the perfect, obedient pawn.  
     "Hello, sir," she greeted a little nervously. "I don't believe we've ever had the pleasure of formally meeting."  
     I greeted her and insisted she relax. "I suppose I should tell you exactly _why_ I asked you to meet with me and why in this hotel instead of at my own house."  
     "Ethan and Oletia both told me of your mission. Straight from Duke Dermail himself...I must say I'm in awe, sir." Her eyes showed it.  
     "Then half my work is already done." I smiled. "The Peacecrafts need a new Queen. They need to produce more heirs."  
     "Why sir?" she looked genuinely baffled. "Why not just let them die out? I don't think you should be helping them. They're weak now! We could take them out."  
     "If only we could," I snorted. "The Sanc Kingdom is not weak. The deaths of the former queen and heirs have only strengthened the kingdom with its allies. If we take out the king now, it will cause more harm and trouble than good. No, a new queen must be found and new heirs must be made. It may seem like we're helping them, but think about this: if the new queen were secretly a woman of Romefeller, how do you think the king would change from that? We change the king and his ideas just enough so that when he is finally taken out, no one will riot."  
     She took this in and thought for a moment. Finally, she looked at me. "Wait...sir. You're not...suggesting me?"  
     I nodded. "I am."  
     "Oh, no! I couldn't!"  
     "Nonsense. You would like to be queen, right?" She nodded. "You want to be a mother soon, correct?" She nodded again. "You want to help Romefeller no matter what, yes?" Again, she nodded. "Then help me with this."  
     "Shouldn't you be entrusting this sort of thing to a different woman? Laura Melaine or Alyssa Vandivier would be much better than I."  
     "They are well known, Katrina. It could be done, yes, but they will be much more suspicious, and everyone will blame Romefeller when the kingdom falls. It will be easier to come up with a story for you. No one will be suspicious of you as queen. I can assure you of that. Think of the prestige and honor you will bring to your family by helping me with this assignment. I know all too well how hard it is to move up in Romefeller, and I know how your father will enjoy it so."  
     She took another moment to think. She seemed uncertain, but I could see it in her eyes already she would agree with me. "What story would you have for me?" she asked coyly.  
     "You attend church each and every Sunday, correct?"  
     "Of course I do."  
     "I do not know what drove Heero Yuy to Total Pacifism, but Christianity is at the core of the Sanc Kingdom's principles. Your story will be that your faith in Christ brought you to pacifism. You'll say He showed you how wicked your family and the Alliance with Romefeller is."  
     "I'm going to say Jesus told me war is bad?" Katrina asked disbelievingly. I could understand why she would have a hard time with it. While most families of Romefeller attended some kind of church, as children, they were taught Jesus guided the leaders of the Foundation and Alliance through everything. Thus, they felt God wanted war, that they were vindicated.  
     "It will take time, but you will be able to do it. Trust me, they'll believe it."  
     "I still need to think this through and find out more," she warned. "But, I'll agree to this for now." I smiled and assured her she could withdraw at any time.

I had to keep on the move. I was sure that either Nicolo or Winston (or even both) would keep tabs on those of us searching—hoping to find the rat. I knew I could not risk submitting another maiden, lest she actually make it. I had to focus on the one I had found, and I had to make sure she was the one chosen.  
     I was given ample time to find as many maidens as I could and to dwindle the number down to the most deserving and to the most qualified. Instead, Katrina followed me around the provinces as I set up false interviews. I held interviews in the morning while Katrina attended church. It was essential to the plan that she be entrenched in Christian lore. Most Romefeller members were not strictly in the faith, and when I first saw Katrina, she could not name more than three of the Ten Commandments. I would end for lunch, and mid-afternoon, I would begin my lessons with her. I had to teach her about pacifism nearly from scratch. Honestly, it was a wonder she even attended any Mass at all for nearly three decades.  
     "How can they defend themselves?" she asked. "They have no army!"  
     "They don't defend themselves with force," I explained. "They believe in peace and lead by example."  
     "But how will they do that without weapons?"  
     I needed all the time I could get. She could not wrap her mind around the idea of being in a country that still existed even though it had no way of protecting its borders. In fact, for many months, she refused even to step foot into the kingdom because she did not feel safe in the weaponless state. It took even longer to get her to travel without some sort of weapon on herself. She always carried a small hidden gun or knife.  
     "Name the Ten Commandments," I had to quiz her each day.  
     "'Thou shalt honor thy father and mother,' 'thou shalt not covet thy neighbor,' 'thou shalt have no other gods before Me,'"—these were the first three she knew from the beginning, and the first one was the only one the Foundation stressed—"'thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain,' um, 'remember the Sabbath by keeping it holy'...and...."  
     I cleared my throat. I could work on the order and exact wording later.  
     "Oh! 'Thou shalt make no idols,' 'thou shall not steal,' 'don't murder,' and what was that other one.... 'Thou shalt not commit adultery.' I can't remember the last one, but I'm getting good, right? I know nine out of ten!"  
     "'Thou shalt not bear false witness,'" I submitted.  
     "What?"  
     "Don't lie."  
     "I'm not!"  
     Yes, it took a lot of time.

One long year later, it was time to rendezvous at the capital. A few others had asked for a couple months extension, so it turned out to be the perfect amount of time to get Katrina acquainted with the kingdom and with the people. She was able to charm the people much faster and easier than she was able to learn about pacifism. I started to feel that we might have a good chance to pull this off.  
     Katrina was able to befriend and to enchant the pacifists much better than she was able to comprehend their ideals. The common townspeople thought she was quite the lady. She went to Mass each Sunday and spent a few hours each week helping the church. The people felt she was also pious and more devout than the other women. I was even more impressed when Katrina held her temper. There were a few situations I knew that rubbed her the wrong way, whether the citizens knew it or not, but she did not show her displeasure nor her longing to lash out and attack them. I must say I grew quite proud of her and her achievement in such a short time.  
     The time soon came for the interviews, the inspections. Katrina and I were both nervous about the outcome. Each member held an interview privately with each woman. Then, all would come together at the end and review. If the need should arise, some of the women would be re-interviewed in whatever manner was deemed necessary. I was able to find some question that each woman "failed." I just hoped the other searchers would not do the same to ensure their catches made it, too.  
     "Pagan, I want a word with you," Aderton said one day. I had similar conversations with many others.  
     "Yes?" I asked in a quite innocent tone.  
     "It's about Katrina," he said very seriously.  
     I put on a face of mixed confusion and shock. "What about her? Has she done anything wrong?"  
     "Well..." he started uneasily. "You...you do know who her family is, right?"  
     "Yes, I met with them."  
     "Pagan, she's a member of Romefeller!"  
     "Did she conceal that?"  
     "Well...no, she told me about them."  
     "She was cooperative?"  
     "Yes, very."  
     "Then what is the problem?"  
     That shut up most of them. They felt too guilty for doubting my choice. The only one who caused problems was Winston. He did not just take my word for it, and he questioned me frequently on Katrina. She told me he also kept recalling her back for follow-up questions. I also noticed his murmurs to the king behind my back.  
     "She says she does not agree with her family," I insisted.  
     "Pagan, I have trusted your judgement thus far, but I believe you've been had this time," Winston told me honestly.  
     "You will judge her on her family? I see the Christian values in you so well," I sneered. However, I knew it was in vain. He would not guilt so easily.  
     "Do not try that on me," he warned. "You are letting her manipulate you. I say she is a spy from Romefeller. They sent her to get in with you and thus in here. She could be sending them decoded messages. They could attack at any moment! She could be sent to poison the king! I won't let her near him."  
     "You cannot deny her a fair chance because of her heritage!" I argued. "She's the best choice, and you know it."  
     "You overestimate your power in this king and underestimate mine," he growled.  
     I had to take action, and I had to do it quickly. Nicolo would not wait for a selection for much longer, and Winston was swaying everyone to his side much faster and easier than Katrina could charm them. One thing against Winston was his method of swaying others to his side. He could be very loud and forceful when he wanted to be. He had many allies in the kingdom, but they were mostly intimidated by him. I knew it would not take too much to plant seeds of mistrust.  
     "I believe we can see the traitor," I hissed to the others in the halls privately. "How do we know of Winston's loyalties? Katrina has been very open on everything. She's passed through everyone else's inspection, yet Winston stalls because her family is in Romefeller—which she freely admits. She's a good Christian maiden who's followed Christ to pacifism. Should we exclude her because her family opposes us? I believe _he_ is the spy. He wants the thrown weak."  
     "Winston has been in the country for years," argued Aderton. "He could have had many opportunities before this. He can't be the spy."  
     "Do you think Romefeller is so stupid they would send a spy in at the weakest point? You underestimate the enemy," I chastised. "They would have sent in a spy much earlier to weaken the thrown little by little."  
     "Wouldn't a Romefeller queen suit him, then?" inquired George. "Wouldn't she help him with his cause?"  
     "Isn't it quite clear that Katrina is on our side? She may not recognize Winston instantly, but I'm sure given time she could recall him from somewhere and reveal him as the spy he is! _That_ is why he opposes her so. She is the one on our side, not he," I declared.  
     "If what you say is true...then we must be rid of Winston," Matthew realized in a gasp.  
     "Take out the traitor! We must report this to the king immediately!" cried Aderton.  
     I smiled. This was all too easy. Winston would be out of the way soon, and the king would have no one to whisper into his ear that things were amiss. Katrina would be queen, and she would change Nicolo's heart even more. She would have children soon, and if one of those children should gain the crown, the pacifist nation of Sanc would be no more. Everything was working out fine. My only problem was that the Alliance was getting impatient, and even Dermail and Romefeller were having trouble keeping them happy.

"I need more time," I told Dermail. "You wanted him taken down from the inside. That takes time. If you want a quick fix, just assassinate him already!"  
     "You know we can't do that," the duke hissed.  
     "Then allow me to have the time I need to take down this crown from the inside. It takes time. You should just learn a little patience."  
     "I cannot afford to let you have a decade to take down this king. He will die of old age before we can take out the kingdom!"  
     "Do you know Katrina Sprengelmeyer?"  
     "Sprengelmeyer, Sprengelmeyer...yes, the family name sounds familiar," he decided.  
     "At this very moment, she's poised to be the next queen. The selection committee—without me as I am the one who nominated her—the selection committee is voting this hour on the matter. I have taken steps to ensure that she will be passed."  
     This caused him to pause. He thought for a few minutes, and slowly but surely a smile crept onto his face. He thought more on what Katrina as queen really meant, and he started to laugh. A glint came to his eye, and I knew I would have as much time as I needed and wanted.

Katrina called me hours later, ecstatic at the news. She had indeed been chosen as the new queen. She could hardly wait to have the crown fitted. I returned to Sanc as quickly as I could after the call. When I came into the palace, a servant informed me that King Peacecraft wished to see me the instant I returned. I left my luggage in the hands of my servants and went directly to Nicolo.  
     "I thought congratulations were in order," Nicolo explained when I came to his rooms.  
     "Congratulations, sir?"  
     "I hear you're the one who found Katrina, the woman to be my next wife." He offered me a drink. "I believe that constitutes congratulations."  
     I smiled. "Yes...I suppose it does."  
     "You got your way, Pagan. You found a young woman, and you took out all those who stood in her way. She'll now be the queen. You refused to let her lose."  
     "I took out a man very close to you," I said. "Sire...I _am_ sorry about Winston."  
     "You knew he was not a spy of Romefeller! _You knew it!_ And yet you took him out just to get your way. You're as bad as the Alliance." He gave me a look of disgust before taking a long drink and turning his back toward me.  
     "Winston may or may not have been a spy. He did, however, hinder us just as much as any spy would."  
     "Do not play games with me," he warned. "I will not play these mind games. They're for the weak and the cowardly."  
     I know he never believed Winston was a spy, but he also never knew my true reasons for disposing of him. Nicolo thought I merely wanted my candidate to succeed or at the very worst I wanted Winston's job. I doubt his mind entertained the notion of my being the true spy for very long. I was a loyal subject of years, and we had been through much in my time at the palace. We confided in each other, comforted each other, and challenged each other. I had even saved his life a couple times! No, he thought I was simply ambitious. He highly disapproved of my methods, but he did not sense the true source of my malice.  
     "Do you have anything to say for yourself?"  
     "I believe what I did was right," I insisted.  
     "For yourself or for the kingdom?" he asked, knowing my answer.  
     "Of course it works to my advantage," I admitted. "I believe it works for the kingdom as well. Winston is loyal to Total Pacifism, but he is part of the old way."  
     "And I'm not?"  
     "You're the head, sire. You adapt as needed. Winston was stifling you and the kingdom. He held us back too much. One way or another he would have worked against us," I argued.  
     He snorted again, clearly not convinced, but he dropped the subject, believing I was just a backstabbing aristocrat. I then had to convince him that Katrina was not too young for him.  
     "She's not even thirty," he pointed out. "Periangelo would have been her age, were she still alive today. I'm too old for her."  
     "She's almost thirty, and it is not going to be the first time this big of an age gap is in a married couple." I paused. "You already agreed to take on a new wife. You never put any restriction on her age. A younger bride will be better for baring children." I produced a photograph of Katrina and handed it to him. He took it and considered her.  
     "She looks a nice a girl."  
     I kept my eye on his. "She is. She's very sweet, and she wants to be your bride, despite knowing the age difference." All I needed was a little glint that did not hold a fatherly tone.  
     "Fine," he relented. "I'll meet with her to see how far this will go."

It was a beautiful ceremony but not too extravagant. Nicolo held some kind of affection toward his new wife. They had a short honeymoon, but he was needed at the kingdom. Things were very quiet for a little more than a year as the couple settled into life, as the people were getting used to Katrina, and as everyone patiently awaited the first royal birth in years. However, the new queen approached privately me one day with a dilemma.  
     "Pagan, I'm not pregnant yet! It's been more than a year," Katrina moaned to me.  
     I chuckled. "Babies take time, Katrina. You cannot expect to be holding a babe ten months after the wedding."  
     "I do not have time!" she insisted. "He is an old man. It took me long enough to get him to bed me."  
     "I know his age," I growled. I was two years Nicolo's elder.  
     "Whatever argument you used to have him accept me is wearing thinner each day. I _need_ a baby to allay his doubts. He's getting older, so it's harder to father a child."  
     "But not impossible," I pointed out.  
     "You want to cast out my doubts? Have the king tested and prove to me he's still very capable of fathering brats."  
     "The king would never consent to a test of that sort, and I would never ask him. I won't jeopardize my position by it, and you better not either."  
     She gave me a patronizing look. "You think I'm that stupid?" She took out a vial filled with a liquid, whose origins I was afraid to ask. "The last time he came to my room, I—"  
     "—I don't need to know!" I interrupted. "You used your feminine wiles as his wife to get a sample of the king. Let's...let's leave it at that." Unlike this younger generation, I was perfectly happy to leave out some details.  
     Katrina wore an amused smile at my reaction, but she nodded and left it at that. "I can't get this tested obviously. Everyone will know. I'm sure you know some doctor who will be discreet. Prove to me he's still able to have children."  
     I did not appreciate the wench ordering me, she was letting this short role as queen go to her head, so I gave her a sneer before I took the vial. I indeed knew a discreet doctor, and her point was valid, though I hated to admit it.  
     A few days later, I went to visit Dr. Dorado. He was the secret consultant of many members of Romefeller; it was said Duke Dermail even went to him on certain matters, so I knew he could be trusted. I gave him the vial, and he gave the test top priority. When the results came in, he did not look hopeful.  
     "Is it that bad?" I asked gravely, fearing the worst.  
     "It could be worse," he admitted. "However, it's not good. He can still father a child, but the chances are very low. By natural means, I would be very surprised, even with a fertile young woman. The safest, most assured way would be in-vitro fertilization."  
     An heir had to be born. We had to have one. "Do you have enough left of that sample?"  
     "We'd need another one for the best chances," he informed me. "Bring the young woman in, and a nurse will explain everything she needs to do. If she can't get another sample, this one will do, but we really need a fresher one."  
     I nodded. "It's...I'm sure it's possible for her. I'll relay the message to her." I thought for a moment. "This could be their only child, correct?" Dorado nodded. "Is there...any way to ensure we have a male heir?"  
     "Scientifically, yes, I could."  
     "We need a male," I told him. "If this is the only way, then so be it."  
     I returned to the palace and immediately requested an audience with the queen. I had made such requests before, so no one suspected anything out of the ordinary, and as I had been the one to find her, they knew our families were friends. In private, I relayed to her the doctor's news.  
     "I have to have surgery?" she asked, a little hysterical.  
     I shook my head. "They can do it without surgery."  
     She relaxed then stiffened. "I have to get another sample." I nodded. "He could figure it out."  
     "He may not," I said simply. She looked out the window at the courtyard below. "You need a baby to secure your position. A male child will do that even better, correct?" She made a slight nod with her head. "If you do it this way, a son will be guaranteed." She kept gazing out the window without saying a word. "What's wrong?" I finally asked, irritated.  
     "It's...nothing," she sighed.  
     I reminded her of her duty and obligation. I should have been more adamant about it.

Within three months, the expectation of a royal heir was announced. Only four people knew the babe was not made naturally (myself, the mother, the doctor, and the nurse), and only we four knew from the beginning the infant would be a prince. I saw everyone's preparations for the birth. They all hoped for a boy, but none knew for certain. Despite his initial feelings, Nicolo was quite anxious about becoming a father again, and he was ecstatic at the thought of holding a son in his arms once again.  
     The news finally came months later. Sanc had a new heir. Katrina had a little boy. At the first quiet moment (Nicolo became the proud father once again and displayed his son as often as possible), Katrina had me hold the lad. I never knew why, but she was dead set on my holding her firstborn. I hated looking that child. I knew he would have a horrible existence, and it would be my fault. I was not the only one to blame, but I knew I would be part of the cause for his life.  
     They named him after Katrina's beloved grandfather, Milliardo.


	2. Part 2

Katrina and I kept changing the king as much as we dared. He came to believe many members of Romefeller were not as bad as he originally thought, and he began associating with non-pacifistic nations. Winston had always made sure all treaties were in line with Total Pacifism. I managed to get a few approved that were in the grey area. Many extended family members were mysteriously dropping dead left and right, so Katrina kept pushing for arming the guards to keep herself and their son safe. That, however, was where Nicolo drew the line clearly and boldly in the sand.  
     He was not a weak king, and he held true to his ideals. His senators and courtiers could be swayed against one person inside their group occasionally given the right conditions, and with that many voices, Nicolo had to allow the court's will. He, however, was a stubborn man. I could barrage him with tragedy and cause him to grieve heavily. I could have him spend more time with those in favor the military expansion, hoping to have _some_ influence. I could impose on him a much younger wife and newborn son. I could make his mind and his decisions venture to the grey area of his teachings, but he would never go past that. He would never take on any weapons, even for his son. He would not play the politics or games of Romefeller.  
     This annoyed me greatly. I could only push him so far without arousing too much suspicion, and he refused to go any further. I knew the Alliance breathed down Dermail's neck, wanting to do more and in a manner of which he would approve. I guess he succumbed to pressure or became too impatient because a little after Milliardo's second birthday, Dermail sent a little tart.

* * *

"I am _not_ a tart!" Mrs. Darlian insisted in an indignant tone.  
     "I believe you forget how you were at that age," Pagan said nonchalantly, taking another sip of wine.  
     "I may have been much younger than you, but that does not give you the right to call me a tart!" she cried. "I never did anything to warrant the name!"  
     "What about General Catalonia?"  
     She hesitated. "I never touched him after marriage."  
     "I saw you two at parties when you believed you were in private."  
     "Sneaking a few kisses does not merit calling me a 'tart'!"  
     "Let's ask Mrs. Catalonia if it does."  
     "Oh please that woman never cared about that at all," she sneered.  
     "I thought you said you never touched him after marriage."  
     "I didn't!"  
     "Then why do I sense a mistress's jealousy?"  
     Gritting her teeth, she stood angrily. "I won't take these insults!"  
     "Calm down," he said in the same blasé tone of voice. "You take things too seriously. If it makes you feel better, I won't refer to you as a tart anymore."  
     "Or any of its synonyms," she added.  
     He smiled amusedly, "Or any of its synonyms."

* * *

Dermail had taken a different route this time. The tar—woman did not come from an unknown family. She came from one of the families directly below the Dermails, who was the ruling family for all intents and purposes. Marquis Weridge had made a name for himself, and his sons had continued his legacy by joining the military. His youngest son had died under one of Dermail's sons-in-law's command, and I believe that was the cover story for sending in this young woman. She was a daughter of Weridge and had been very close to the deceased.  
     I knew she was trouble from the start. She was not a good pacifist, and everyone could see she did not want to be there. I believe the story was that her family was turning toward pacifism and sent her there to gather more information and to calm her soul hopefully. Unlike some, I had the privilege of knowing who her lover was. He was a married man, and I was afraid she might corrupt Katrina, who was getting unhappier and unhappier in her marriage. Yes, I should have known she and Katrina would get along nicely and would—"

* * *

"—I did _not_ 'corrupt' Katrina!" Mrs. Darlian shouted, interrupting Pagan's story. "I barely knew the woman! When I met her, she was thirty-one. I was twenty-five. We did  not grow up together! Our families didn't even know each other."  
     "You were still one of her ladies-in-waiting."  
     "Yes, and she may have known who I was, but I had no idea her family was in Romefeller. I thought she was the queen everyone else thought. I didn't know she was your little pawn and spy," she explained. Pagan took a moment to be proud of the late queen before Mrs. Darlian continued, "And, I believe I just finished explaining I wasn't anyone's lover! I never did anything inappropriate with Alexander after he married that witch! Though, believe me, he wanted to do things with me. I remained a proper young woman."  
     "Because you're so virtuous?" he sneered, not believing her.  
     "Because if Anda so much as got a whiff of his being unfaithful, she'd have run home crying to Daddy, and you think Duke Dermail wouldn't do anything to my family? No, once he learned I was the 'tart' who made Alexander stray and caused Anda to cry, he would have started his revenge faster than you could call your troops," she retorted with a snort and a roll of her eyes.  
     Pagan filled his glass and took a long, slow drink, allowing her to cool off. Once she had calmed, he continued with his story.

* * *

Either way, the trouble did not start until Lady Cassandra Elizabeth Weridge, a younger daughter of Marquis Weridge, showed up at the kingdom. She was made a lady-in-waiting to the queen, and things definitely picked up at a faster pace once she arrived. With more ladies-in-waiting and her son getting a little older, the queen wanted to hold more parties. Nicolo was a very indulgent husband and allowed her to throw all the parties she wanted and left the guest list to her.  
     With no one reviewing the guest list beforehand, many new faces appeared in the kingdom, faces no one had ever thought would be seen in the kingdom. Alliance military personnel, Romefeller members, and popular musicians for the war now frequently visited Sanc. At first, I was happy with this. Things were changing rapidly and in our favor. However, I began to notice little things. I brushed them off as being nothing more than times changing, but soon I could not ignore them.  
     General Alexander Catalonia and his cousin-in-law General Tretton Khushrenada were the most frequent visitors. They even came when there were no parties. Sometimes the men's wives accompanied them, and they were the best of guests. However, both men were starting families, and the women frequently stayed elsewhere with the young children. Nicolo and Katrina always insisted the children were welcome as well, but Tretton seemed to think his son was too rambunctious for the mild-mannered country. I believed they just wanted an excuse to leave their wives behind. This was more or less confirmed as Anda Catalonia became pregnant with their first child, and Alexander spent more time in the kingdom and around a certain lady-in-waiting, who now insists nothing inappropriate happened in all those midnight visits. Besides being away from his wife and child, I am not quite sure why Tretton kept coming except maybe as a chaperone for his close friend, for his eyes never strayed from Eleanor.  
     Nicolo welcomed them but eventually felt they were visiting too frequently. Katrina either was oblivious to his feelings or else simply ignored them. He asked me to help his eyes and ears at his wife's increasingly frequent parties.  
     "You want me to chaperone?" I asked, fairly amused at the time by the proposal.  
     "More or less," he acknowledged, watching out his window. The queen, her ladies, and the small prince were having a picnic in the open field outside the window.  
     "Surely you don't believe the queen is being unfaithful, Your Majesty."  
     "I don't, but I am worried about this new set of friends she's acquired. Romefeller is filling her head with ideas. She's becoming almost fanatical about this arming the Imperial Guard idea." He shook his head.  
     "You know how protective new, young mothers are," I assuaged. I joined him at looking out the window. "I'm sure she just wanted to reconnect with old friends, and with being in the Alliance, I'm sure their tales have caused her to worry even more." I watched the group outside. "It's good to have her socializing, sire. She was suffering from some sort of depression for too long after the prince's birth."  
     "She wanted a girl," he said. "She thinks that boy is her only child, and she wanted a girl. I understand why she got depressed." He paused for a moment. "She barely spends time with him. Milliardo doesn't know his mother. Look, he's even with that lady-in-waiting. Katrina is ignoring him, wrapped up in conversation with the ladies."  
     I looked and noticed he was with Cassandra. "One glimpse of a moment does not translate to her neglecting her son."  
     He shook his head. "I've been watching her for some time, and I've talked with my son. She's drawing away from him."  
     "Give her time, my king," I implored. "She may just be going through a phase."  
     Eyes on his son, he nodded. "What do you know of Lady Cassandra?"  
     "Only what you know, sire," I admitted. Well, I knew she also sneaked out to meet with General Catalonia, but I did not think that tidbit of gossip was something he really needed to know.  
     "Do you know of any lovers?"  
     "I don't think anything serious. Why?"  
     "She's a good maiden, and she spends a lot of time with Milliardo. I want to reward her for her loyalty. One of my senators is quite taken with her. Do you know Richard? I think they would make a fine match. Perhaps part of her reward can be a nice wedding." He smiled at me, eyes twinkling. He was a hopeless romantic sometimes.  
     I turned to look at Cassandra. Yes, I knew Christopher Richard Darlian, and I knew of his crush on "Lady Cassandra." He followed her around like a puppy at times, but she seemed to hold no affection for him. I was under the impression she just wanted to shrug him off and have him leave her alone. However, Nicolo was set on the match, so I kept my mouth shut on the matter.  
     "It's okay, Pagan. I know you hate discussing this," he said at length. "Just...just keep your eyes open and your ears alert at the parties."  
     I nodded. " _That_ , I can do."

I only had to break up a few young couples in bushes for the first couple months. There were no military coups being plotted within the borders. No one was scheming to poison any member of the royal family. I was a little amused and a little irritated at having to play chaperone after everything else through which I had been. However, as you can imagine, I came across something that changed everything.  
     "I suggest you go find a room or wait until the end of the party," I told a young couple. They blushed deeply and ran out from the garden, toward the party. I chuckled and shook my head. Some things never changed. I knew I could always find couples in the garden, and their conversation was always the same.  
     "Are you sure? What if someone finds us?"  
     "That's what makes it so exciting. Hey, no, we won't get caught."  
     I broke up yet another couple when I saw a familiar young man. My son Ethan had made it to the party somehow. As I made my way to him, I wondered why he was there. I was happy to see him, but he knew of my mission, so I knew he would not just show up. Something had to be wrong, and I worried about my children.  
     "Ethan! You came all this way and didn't tell me you were—" I stopped mid-sentence. I saw the reason he came and the reason he did not tell me. He was busy with a woman. I chuckled inwardly at the thought of having to break up my own son with his lady friend, but my amusement ended when I saw who his companion was.  
     "ETHAN!" I bellowed. The two broke away but did not appear ashamed at all.  
     "Father!" he coughed, straightening his clothes. "I...I thought you don't attend these sorts of parties."  
     "What the _hell_ do you think you're doing?" I asked in a strained voice. I glanced around the garden, making sure no one was near. I pulled them into one of the gardening sheds before anyone else could see.  
     "Of all the stupid, idiotic things..." I started angrily.  
     "Don't judge us," warned Ethan. "We're in love."  
     I rolled my eyes and snorted. "She's a married woman! A queen!" I turned my eyes onto her for the first time. "And you, Katrina, you should be the most ashamed! You have a son, you're a queen, and you're helping Romefeller. This incredibly stupid, selfish act could jeopardize all our hard work."  
     " _Our_ hard work?" sniffed Katrina. "You're not the one married to a geriatric. You're not the one who can only have one child—a boy nonetheless—because your husband is too old to produce another one naturally. You didn't throw your life away just for some stupid foundation that doesn't even care about you!" She wiped her eyes. "If you mess up, things are done. If I do, my life is ruined. I'll always be known as the traitor queen. Even though my family is proud of me for this, if I get found out, I have nowhere to go. No one would touch the conniving queen who tried to trick and take down the great King Peacecraft." She turned her back towards us. "You said I could pull out any time. I want to pull out now. I don't want to be in this marriage anymore. I want to be with a husband who loves and cares for me, who's my age."  
     "It's too late. When you took those vows, there was no turning back. You knew it then."  
     "Father!" my son gasped. "Please, be sympathetic. Peacecraft doesn't care for her like he should, like I do. When you came that day to get her, we had just started our relationship. It was nothing serious, and we both thought it was just a passing fling, so she agreed to your proposal. Father, in the five years we've been apart, all I did was think about Katrina. Ask Oletia; I've been a wreck!"  
     "The same has been true of me, Pagan. It took time and distance to show us how much we're in love with each other."  
     "Just remember Romeo and Juliet died in the end," I snarled. "You worry about Nicolo exiling you? Well, if that is all that should happen, you should count yourself lucky. If our covers are broken, do you think Dermail will hesitate at all in ordering our executions? And there won't be any mourning for us. He'll have our memories stamped out of history. You'll be forever known as Nicolo's unknown middle wife and queen who could only produce one heir, one who died with her." I gave her another glare for good measure. "Go back to your husband and stay by his side for the rest of the night!" I barked. She gave a look at Ethan before she fled the shed quickly.  
     "We're alone now," he said eventually. "You were too hard on her."  
     "If I could, I would tan your hide right here and now!" I shouted at him, ignoring him. "Why would you travel here for that woman? Are you _looking_ for trouble?"  
     "Believe it or not, I didn't come here for Katrina." He gave me a look I had never seen before in him. It was dripping of deliberate disobedience. "Khushrenada and Catalonia are some of the closest in-laws I've ever seen. Catalonia needed a unit to work with his Specials for some test or something, so Khushrenada volunteered us. They've been spending time here, so I have, too. I met up with Katrina a month or so ago, and we both told each other how big of fools we have been. I didn't come here with the intentions of having an affair with a queen and endangering your mission. However, now that I have and have seen how miserable Katrina is, I won't just leave like nothing's happened. I won't. I'm going to do something."  
     "Don't you dare," I hissed. "Leave her to me. I'll take care of her."  
     "I don't believe you." He had solidity and resolve to his eyes. "I'm going over to Marseilles for a few weeks. When I get done with tests there, I'm coming here for Katrina. Nothing you say can change that." He tugged stiffly on the edge of his military jacket and walked briskly out of the shed without letting me respond.  
     I watched his back for some time even after I could no longer see it. I knew who was to blame. Catalonia was more or less his commanding officer for the time being, and Katrina had surely seen Lady Cassandra with him. I knew then and there that the tart was to blame for the infidelity.

* * *

" _ **Excuse** me_?" Mrs. Darlian cried.  
     "That was my thought at the time." Pagan shrugged. "It's how I saw it."  
     She pursed her lips, clearly biting her tongue as hard as she could. "I told you quite obstinately before that I didn't do any of that. We may have kissed a little inappropriately and may have wanted more, but we didn't go any further."  
     "I thought you said before you were the strong one, he was the one who wanted more."  
     She looked way. "We were good friends and talked a good deal—we weren't always snogging as you so blatantly imply. When things got a little heated between us, he did mention he wished things could be as before he was forced to marry Anda, but I was always the one who brought him back to reality. He may not have picked Anda given the chance, but he did care for her in some way, I suppose. Don't blame us."

* * *

I requested a meeting with Generals Catalonia and Khushrenada. I needed to speak with them on my son but also on my future plans. I felt I had changed the king as I ever could and the time had finally come when the kingdom would be crushed. We met outside the kingdom at one of Khushrenada's summer homes. Their wives and children were absent, spending the day in town.  
     "Please, take a seat," Khushrenada offered.  
     I sat opposite of the two great Alliance generals. I'm sure they wondered why _I_ would even consider contacting them, even if they knew my mission. They were the poster boys of the Alliance and Foundation. They were young, successful, good-looking, and very charming. The fact that they were good friends only helped their causes.  
     "First I'd like to offer my congratulations. I hear your wife had a daughter," I started.  
     "Yes, she did. Thank you. We named her Dorothy; she's so beautiful." Catalonia was very much the proud father. He probably would have kept talking except for the look Khushrenada gave him.  
     I looked at the other. "I also heard rumors of your wife expecting another one?"  
     Khushrenada chuckled. "Oh she better not be! I've been away for months, and she wasn't pregnant when I left." The two young men shared a look of amusement.  
     "You've been mostly in Sanc," I said in a serious tone.  
     "We  were invited," replied Catalonia indignantly. They must have taken offense at my tone of voice.  
     "You've been spending a lot of time with Lady Cassandra."  
     "My cousin-in-law has done nothing inappropriate and has not broken his marriage vows. Of that, I can assure you," defended Khushrenada before Catalonia could.  
     "Yes, I thought that was why you were there. Give each other alibis," I muttered. "I'm not here to blackmail you or to get you into trouble with your wives or Dermail. I only bring up this because I believe your behavior may have had some affect on my son."  
     "Oh?"  
     "Do you know my son?" I asked. They both looked at each other; searching their memories, I'm sure.  
     Suddenly, Khushrenada's face lit up in recognition. "Oh! Yes, your son is Ethan, isn't he?" He smiled and reminded Catalonia of my son. The two smiled yet again and turned back to me. "What can we do for you? How do you think we've been a bad influence on him?"  
     "I've recently discovered he's carrying on an affair with Queen Katrina."  
     Both men took a deep, sharp breath and wore shocked expressions. Obviously, they had not known.  
     "My reaction was slightly more explosive," I commented. "He wants to 'save' her from her marriage."  
     "We can't let that happen," agreed Catalonia looking to the older Khushrenada for advice. "We could relocate him?"  
     Khushrenada nodded in approval. "I'll have him re-stationed. We don't need to make a scene out of this, nor do we need to let him know we know about it. I could send him to space. That should keep him away from getting to her any too easily."  
     I shook my head. "I'm not asking for anything like that, not yet at least. I hear he is heading over to Marseilles for a month or so?"  
     "He'll be there with his squadron. They're staying as long as it takes, but we're estimating about a month, yes," confirmed Khushrenada. "Would that even be enough time?"  
     "I just need time to work with Katrina. If I have enough time, I may not need Ethan moved."  
     "But you want us to give you time to do that," offered Khushrenada.  
     "And you want us to re-station him if you fail," finished Catalonia.  
     I nodded. "I hope that's not asking too much?" It honestly did not matter whether it was or not. They were going to help me no matter what. They could not afford to be the ones who caused this mission to fail.  
     "We'll help you however you need," Catalonia promised.  
     "That brings me to my other reason for visiting," I said. "I believe the time has come for the downfall of the Sanc Kingdom." Both sat up straighter.  
     "Are you sure?"  
     "Are you absolutely sure?"  
     "Yes, I am. I don't believe I can push Nicolo any further. This is the best chance we'll get at their destruction."  
     "Have you spoken to Dermail?" asked Catalonia.  
     "I did not realize you needed his permission for every decision." Seeing their reactions to my statement, I quickly added, "Your Graces."  
     "It's not that we need his permission," started Catalonia.  
     "It's just that Duke Dermail is starting a new...strategy. One that we've helped him with, and we'll have to make sure we have all the information on your thing before we proceed," continued Khushrenada.  
     "After all, our strategy is guaranteed. We don't have all of your information, so we can't make a decision on whether or not your 'mission' would benefit ours or not—whether it is even feasible at this point," finished Catalonia.  
     All I could do was stare for awhile. They stared back for a few moments. However, they eventually let me think and turned to speaking with each other. I was so wrapped up with my thoughts that I cannot even recall what the subject of their conversation was. It was clear that both men would need a lot of proof before they made any move. If they had come up with this other plan personally, they would be even more stubborn and loath to do anything against it.  
     I was saved from making my case right then and there by the women. The voices of young women and children became louder, and I turned to see both men's wives approaching us. The women stood in the doorway, staring at me. The younger woman, whom I guessed to be Anda Catalonia, was holding an infant in her arms. Her older cousin, Eleanor Khushrenada, stood by her side and was reassuring a small boy by stroking the back of his head. Their young child had his head buried in the folds of his mother's skirt.  
     Khushrenada smiled at the women and announced, "We have a guest." He gestured toward me. The women came over, and we were all introduced.  
     "I believe it's time for me to leave," I declared. I left the residence believing I had hit the highest wall.

"I want another test," Katrina demanded weeks later. I looked at her, perplexed. "It took some time to get that old man to return to my bed, but I did it, and I got another sample. I want to have another baby, and this time it's going to be a girl."  
     "Katrina," I started. I did not have time for a prima donna right then.  
     "Don't start, Pagan. You get me a daughter, or I'll tell Nicolo your son raped me."  
     "You don't have any evidence to support that."  
     "He'll admit to it if you don't do exactly what we say."  
     What an idiot I had for a son. "I don't respond well to blackmail."  
     "I'm having a daughter one way or another. You want a little princess for the king? Then make me one. If you won't help me, I'll keep my affair with Ethan until I get pregnant, and that's when I'll cry rape."  
     I was too haggard to argue it. While I did not like caving into demanding women, I needed her, and it was a small demand. I took her sample and returned to Dr. Romero who gave me less than thrilling news.  
     "King Peacecraft can't produce anymore offspring," he said.  
     "You mean naturally."  
     "I mean at all. Even with in-vitro fertilization, the chance of creating a zygote is less than slim."  
     "Can you try anyway? It'll pacify her for a couple weeks," I requested. He sighed and yielded. There was no danger in the procedure; at the worst, it was just a waste of time.  
     Knowing the procedure already, Katrina prepared herself properly. We returned to his clinic later. I waited in the office while she was with the doctor. Last time, I had waited a little more than an hour. This time, Dr. Romero came to me in less than ten minutes.  
     "Is something wrong?" I asked.  
     "I told you the chances of making another heir with his sperm were very low," he reminded. I cursed inwardly. Katrina would not let go of this so easily. "However, even if we could make a zygote, I can't impregnate an already pregnant woman."  
     "What?"  
     "Queen Katrina's pregnant right now."  
     "You're certain?"  
     He gave me a look.  
     "What are the chances that the child is the king's?"  
     He looked away. "I...I suppose there is a one in a hundred billion chance the child belongs to King Peacecraft, but don't bet on it."  
     I closed my eyes and this time did not bother keeping my curses inward. When I opened them again, Katrina stood before me, gloating and glowing.

The pregnancy went by very quickly this time. A princess came to the kingdom, and it was abundantly clear Katrina was the prouder parent this time around. Nicolo was very happy to have a daughter, and he named her after his first wife. I thought at first Katrina would fight that, but she was too happy to have a daughter to care. She had forced me to hold her son before. Katrina refused to let me near her daughter— _my_ grandchild.  
     It was quite clear to anyone that Katrina was happier with a daughter than with a son. She displayed the little princess everywhere, and she was quite giddy with all the little dresses. While most people shrugged this off, the one person who could not was Milliardo. The young prince was only four, but he noticed the difference. He may have believed before that his mother was simply too busy to deal with her children, or he may have simply not known the difference. However, he saw how his mother was with his baby sister, and I was not the only one who observed this. Nicolo grew very impatient with his young wife, and one day during a particularly loud argument, I made sure the lad was far enough away in the palace that he could not overhear any of it.  
     "Your birthday is coming up, young prince. What do you want?" I asked as we walked the halls. His brow creased, and he put as much thought into this serious matter as a four-year-old could. His left hand went to his chin in a mannerism he copied from his father, and he bit his lower lip in one of his mother's mannerisms.  
     "I want...my baby sister gone," he decided. "I heard you can make that happen. Can you?" He looked up at me with wide eyes.  
     "Now, you don't want that," I told him. "You love your little sister."  
     "Mama loves her more."  
     "Your mother is just excited about a new baby. Just wait. Besides, getting rid of your sister won't solve your problem, will it?"  
     "It might."  
     I chuckled. "It won't, and if you got rid of her, you'd miss her."  
     "I guess I might."  
     "Who told you I could make your little sister go away?" I asked gruffly.  
     "Mama," he answered.  
     "What did your mother tell you exactly?"  
     "Let's go in here!" he squealed and ran into the room near us. That was the problem with carrying on a conversation with someone under the age of seven: short attention span. I followed the child into the room, which turned out to be one of the sparring rooms for fencing.  
     "Be careful," I warned.  
     He insisted he was and proceeded to inspect the foils, sabers, and epées. He grabbed the hilts of several and tried pulling them out but, for whatever reason, kept them in their place. Eventually, one pleased him, and he pulled it out. It had a shorter blade, but it was still too long for him. He ignored this fact and began waving the weapon around haphazardly, giggling.  
     "That's not a toy," I told him but let him continue, watching him carefully.  
     "It's Daddy's toy," he squealed happily.  
     "And he won't like it if a certain little boy hurts his toy or gets hurt by his toy."  
     Milliardo stopped, and I was impressed he was listening to me, but he returned to the equipment after a moment and pulled a large foil out, handing it to me. He took his own weapon and attempted to take position. "Fight me! Fight me!"  
     Afterward, I would insist we both wear proper protection when sparring, but that first time, I did not believe we would be doing any serious damage or sparring (he was four for heaven's sake!). Thus, I lightly corrected his stand and got into position myself. He made a few tentative pokes, which I deftly deflected. Getting more comfortable with his blade, he started jabbing and swinging it almost as if it were a bat. I merely blocked all his "attacks" and moved to keep my body from sustaining any harm.  
     " _Fight back!_ " he demanded through grit teeth.  
     "Excuse me?" I said before I could stop myself. I had thought the tyke merely wanted to play with equipment from which he was normally forbidden.  
     "You don't hold back on Daddy. Not me either," he insisted and gave a look more intense than I thought possible in a child his age. He took a step back to look me straight in my eyes. "Fight back!"  
     There is a literary term called "tragic irony." The characters make a decision, and with special knowledge unknown to them, the audience knows it to be doomed. Looking into his eyes, I came to realize the term also applied in the real world and not just in books and plays.  
     He was a small child and up to that point had had his life engulfed in luxury. Except for his mother's engrossment with his sister, he was a very cheerful child. Whether by my plan or that of someone else, I knew that soon this would end. His childhood would come to an abrupt end when the kingdom fell. (He would be lucky if his life did not end with it as well.) I would be at least partly responsible for his future hardship. He did not yet know what true sadness was, and he should have had to wait until he was in his teens at the very least to know even a tenth of what was about to come his way. I was going to shatter this little boy's world.  
     It was easy to look Nicolo in the eye and know what was going to happen. He was a grown man and had probably seen worse in other countries. The members of his court and senate were also adults, and they would understand what happened. Katrina knew full well what was going to happen. Milliardo would barely be able to comprehend the gravity of his kingdom falling, and he would see death and destruction on a scale no young prince should ever see.  
     I always had a soft spot when it came to children, and the guilt that came from looking in his determined eyes is probably what prompted me to say what I said next.  
     "Little prince," I started. "How would you like to learn to fence just like your father?"  
     His eyes lit up in delight. "Could I really? I could fight like Daddy?" It was such a strange thing to come out of a pacifist's son's mouth, especially that of Nicolo, and I could not help but laugh.  
     "Yes, I'm sure he'd be quite proud to have you learn." I clapped him on the back. He dropped the foil and jumped in excitement. "I'm sure he's done with your mother by now. Go ask him permission right now so he can see the excitement in your eyes." He grinned at me and ran straight down the hall.  
     King Peacecraft enjoyed the sport as I said earlier. I was one of his favorite opponents. When he asked me later why I wanted to instruct his son and at such a young age, I told him of Milliardo's apparent affinity for the sport and how he wanted to emulate his father. This, of course, gave me instant permission. While the kingdom thought the child just enjoyed the exercise, I again had ulterior motives—private ones.  
     I could not have stopped the destruction of the Peacecraft family then even if I had wanted to stop it. (You see, the original plan and the plan even this late had been only to take out the family and invade the capital, not destroy the entire kingdom—aristocrats hate things to get _too_ messy.) No, I could not stop the assassination of any member of the family, and I could not stop the prince from witnessing troops march down the streets, but I could arm the prince. Under the guise of instructing the prince in a simple sport, I was able to teach the prince something he would never learn from his father: how to fight back.

I kept waiting for word from Dermail or his younger in-laws, but nothing ever came. I continued my lessons with Milliardo, and I came to learn a great deal about the lad. As for Katrina, I believe she stopped remembering her true purpose for being there. Her whole life revolved around that baby, the baby I was not allowed to get anywhere near. No one really knew I was forbidden from seeing the babe, not even Nicolo. Katrina used various tactics to keep me from my granddaughter, and she was good at having no one suspect anything was amiss. Instead, it was Nicolo who believed they could be attacked at any moment. He was very alert as to every little thing that happened in the kingdom, and he was sure that the Alliance had its hand everywhere. This is not to say he was paranoid and believed assassins were behind every corner, but he could feel the tension in the air better than anyone that the time was soon coming for the Alliance's attack.  
     The only reason I could see for the attack's delay was the coalition Peacecraft was forming. He had over the years converted many countries to Total Pacifism. However, lately the Alliance had been increasing its military presence everywhere, and production of mobile suits was at its highest peak ever. While borderline countries may not have thought it was good to do away with all weapons, they certainly disapproved of the mass production of weapons the Alliance was creating, and they felt war would be a self-fulfilling prophecy under these conditions. Thus, they flocked to Peacecraft, and his power in Romefeller grew. I thought this was a very strange and bad move on the Alliance's part, and I wondered seriously about Khushrenada and Catalonia, for they had to know the consequences of these actions. However, an overheard conversation cleared it for me:  
     "You're sounding like one of them!" our favorite lady-in-waiting sneered. I had been on my way to see Katrina and stopped in my tracks to listen.  
     "Liza, you're not being reasonable," said a voice. After a moment, I recognized it as belonging to Catalonia.  
     "You're becoming a pacifist! You're just too cowardly to say it!"  
     I thought I heard a growl from the great general. "You say that again, and you'll regret it. I don't tolerate being called that, and I won't take it from you just because of our past."  
     "Like you'd do anything to hurt me," she sniffed.  
     "I never meant I'd physically harm you. You know I'd never strike a lady." His tone still had a menacing connotation.  
     "Then tell me why you want to help our enemy?"  
     "King Peacecraft is not our enemy! He's a well-respected member of Romefeller and has always been. I will not be called to turn my back on friends just because Dermail disagrees with their policies. I don't care if he is my father-in-law. Look, I'm not a pacifist, but all this has to stop. I don't agree with Total Pacifism. Weapons are still needed because war will never be stamped out of humans' hearts, no matter how hard anyone tries. There will always be those who will get frustrated with words and take up a sharp stick. However, making all these weapons is dangerous!  
     "I'm a father now. Tretton and I only want to keep our children safe and away from blood-soaked battles. Increasing weapons is only going to draw them into it more and endanger their lives. We don't want to throw away weapons, but we don't like the direction the Alliance is heading in. There's a median between Total Pacifism and total war," General Catalonia argued.  
     "That's why you two are increasing mobile suit production?" Lady Cassandra mocked.  
     "Yes," he responded without shame. "Increasing weapons is forcing the undecided countries to take a stand, to choose a side. For the most part, they are choosing pacifism. With more pacifists, the government will be forced to take the median, to compromise for both sides. That's what we want."  
     "It still smacks of pacifism and treason to me."  
     While the young lady may not have understood the plan (she was too young to grasp the politics of the time), I did. I saw now that the number of pacifists was quickly equaling the number of belligerents. Dermail, though it would probably kill him to admit it, would have to give Peacecraft the time of day.

"The time is soon coming," Nicolo told me one day as we watched Milliardo playing with Relena.  
     "Coming for what?"  
     "Yesterday, before I returned home, I had a private meeting with Duke Dermail," he explained. I stiffened a little, knowing it had some sort of importance. "I've felt a change in the air for some time now. Haven't you?" He did not wait for a response. "Now I have two children to care for. Provisions need to be taken. I won't have their lives cut short because their father defied the Alliance. When my children were grown before, it was fine because they were able to understand the situation, to realize my ideas and sacrifices, and to know when and how to leave when trouble started. Milliardo and Relena are too young to understand anything that's happening now, and they cannot sense the danger in the air or know what could possibly lay in store for them. It's my duty to make sure they're kept safe. I just need to find a way." Here he paused for some time, waiting for my response.  
     "You're not thinking of arming the Imperial Guard, are you?" I asked eventually.  
     "What? No, of course not!" he responded, making it quite clear the very idea was absurd. "I want you to be the one to take them to safety."  
     "Sire?" asked I, taken aback. It was true that since the years with Winston gone, I had filled his place more or less, but I still felt the king would have turned to someone else before entrusting me with his children's lives.  
     "You have the best knowledge outside the kingdom. You could hide them easily until it was safe for them to emerge again. I trust you the most with saving them, Pagan." He looked me directly in the eyes. "Tell me you'll take the children into safety when the time comes and you won't let them come out until their time comes."  
     "I'll do it." I already had in mind a certain family to take the children. I could easily hand both children to Catalonia and Khushrenada, and they could in turn hand the youngsters into Dermail—thus keeping my true identity safe until after the fall.  
     "You have a place in mind already, don't you?" smiled Nicolo.  
     I nodded and told him I did.  
     "Good! Don't tell me. God forbid, should I fall into some military man's hands, I don't want to tell them where my children are on accident. I don't want any knowledge of it. If the kingdom should fall and I somehow live, I also don't want to be tempted into going to them and leading the Alliance to them. No, it's best if I don't know, and I want you to keep this safe from everyone else. Don't even tell Katrina I asked you to do this. She'll raise hell over it."  
     I told him I understood and asked when I should do it.  
     He did not have a set time, but he said soon he would be returning to Brussels and then to Moscow. He had more business with Romefeller—they all feared the Alliance's impatience—and had only returned home to see his children for perhaps the last time. He would call the day before he arrived, and I was to gather the children's things. The children would see their father the next, and after they had greeted him and returned to the nursery, I was to take them to safety and to keep them there until either he sent for them or it was safe. The only other person who was trusted with all this secrecy was one of the Imperial Guards, for I needed someone to help me navigate out of the palace without being caught.  
     Nicolo spent the rest of the afternoon with his children, and I went to one of the heads of the guards, the one who frequently played bodyguard to the royal heirs whenever needed, Baldassare Noin.  
     "I don't think he knows when he'll be returning exactly, which is why I'll have to wait for his call," I explained.  
     "Yes, he explained it all to me," Noin informed. "There's a secret passage in the back of the nursery. When the king arrives, all we have to do is get the nanny to leave, and no one will see a thing."  
     "If I should need to leave without you, can I get through it easily enough?"  
     "There are side passages," he admitted. "Come; I'll show you the way through." I accompanied him into the empty nursery. Noin stood on a stepstool and slid his hand around the light fixture until he tapped some switch. I heard a large click, as if something heavy was unlocking. Then he pushed on the wall behind a bookshelf, and it opened up to a dark passageway. We flicked on our flashlights and headed down it.  
     "It's not an easy thing to open," I observed.  
     "Well, it'll keep the little ones from opening it accidentally. No one knows it's there now. Well, we guards know it, and the king knows it from growing up in the palace, but the kids aren't old enough to have discovered it yet, and we don't let any of the maids know about it. They sneak in enough gentlemen as it is." He gave me a wink, and I struggled to return it with a small smile.  
     "That passage will take you directly to the kitchen, and _that_ passage leads to maids' quarters, linen closets, and the Queen's music room," said Noin, gesturing as he went. "If you take the right path down that way, you'll end up in the gardens. It's the same path King Nicolo's great-grandfather took to flee from Iaşi troops back in AC 48."  
     "Fascinating," I muttered. We continued down the passage, and he showed me where to watch my step and at which corners to turn. Of course, I had to endure endless conversation in between these tidbits of information.  
     When I emerged, I would be at a cathedral a few miles from the palace, but we did not enter the church then. We turned back and entered the palace in another room in case the nursery was being occupied. A maid followed by an Alliance soldier approached us as soon as we returned. The maid had been helping the soldier find me, so Noin returned to his post. The young soldier told me that General Khushrenada wanted a word with me and to meet him in Queen Katrina's quarters. I knew at once it concerned Ethan, and though I wanted to make my way as quickly as possible, I walked at a leisurely pace so that it appeared I had no idea what was really happening.  
     Had Tretton Khushrenada re-stationed Ethan farther away, my son would have realized what was happening and would make it a point to let the world know he fathered the princess of Sanc—ruining everyone's plans. Instead, Khushrenada offered him and a couple other officers the chance for a promotion as well as a substantial raise. The catch? The job was in space. Of course, all accepted the position, and he had them compete for the promotion. Naturally, Ethan won and had been in space for over a year now. I worried that he might be heading home, ready to cause trouble.  
     "Pagan, thank you for joining us," General Khushrenada greeted gravely. Katrina was sitting, looking very nervous. She had not been given the news yet; they were waiting for me to come. I took a seat and looked at Tretton after a flicker of the eyes on Katrina.  
     "What's happened?" Katrina blurted out.  
     "I'm...I couldn't send you a note or a proper notice as you two are, well, undercover, so I thought it best to tell you in person." He paused here, composing his thoughts and probably letting us be happy for a few more moments. While he waited, it came to me how strange it was to see the general without his friend. Catalonia came to the kingdom many times alone, but Khushrenada had never come alone.  
     "I'm...I'm sorry to say that Ethan died at the L-2 battle last Thursday."  
     I stared at him for what felt like an hour but was probably only a second, for Katrina let out a strangled cry and collapsed in her chair. Her head fell into her hands, and her body shook. She was heaving and making sobbing sounds, but I think her eyes were closed too tightly to let any tears fall. Khushrenada went to comfort her, but I did not see if he had any success. I left the room.

I did see Khushrenada again before he left, and I told him of my plan. He assured me he and Alexander would gladly take the children, but I had the feeling he would not turn them over to Duke Dermail. This suited me fine as I had only been handing them over to the duke to keep the three of us alive. Should someone know I was keeping them from him, the children and I would be killed. Khushrenada promised me he would send me word if the Alliance went ahead without the consent of the Foundation. With the government sorely needing the financial backing of the Foundation, I did not think they would even think of attacking without the Foundation's blessing. This, however, showed how out of the loop I had become since being sent to the Sanc Kingdom.

"I'll be leaving tonight," I whispered to Noin barely a week later. I had just gotten off the phone with Khushrenada not ten minutes earlier.  
     "Tonight? The king just left yesterday!"  
     "And there'll be an attack in three days!" Noin gasped. "Make sure the nursery is empty tonight. I'm leaving and taking the children with me."  
     That turned out to be half-false. Katrina had a doctor come to the palace, and it turned out Relena had a cold. She ran a small fever, but she was still unfit for travel. I found I was quite relieved for this. If Relena stayed behind, I could take her with me somewhere else, and I could stay with her. I had not thought of it too much, but I now realized that I could never see my children again. My grandchildren already born and those yet to be would never see me. It was horribly selfish of me to stay with this baby, but she was all I had left of Ethan and the only family I would ever be able to see.  
     It was a beautiful day, so only those who absolutely had to be indoors were. I headed to the young prince's room and put together a travel bag. Most things would be provided by the generals, so he only needed clothes and toys. I grabbed the most comfortable looking outfits and one formal set. He was probably not too fond of the formal set and would not care if he were given a new one. I knew his favorite toys, so I set them next to pack and made sure everything was ready. I kept rehearsing my steps in my throughout the day, so when the time came later that day. I was prepared. I was able to sneak into his room and take him without any problems—which was quite sad.  
     "Where are we going?" Milliardo yawned as he walked with me down the hall. He rubbed his eye and stretched. "Is 'Lena coming too?"  
     "She was, but she's sick, so she can't," I explained. I grabbed his things then scooped him into my arms. "Just...put your head on my shoulder and try to sleep."  
     "I can't, Pagan," the boy whined, but he obeyed.  
     Noin flicked the switch, and we made our way through the secret passages. The child had fallen asleep quicker than he let on, so the journey was thankfully in silence. I entered the cathedral and bid adieu to Noin, assuring him I could get back into the palace just fine on my own. He gave his final goodbye to the small prince and then went back.  
     After the guard had left and shut the door, my contact came out of hiding.  
     "Here's the boy," I said handing the young child to General Catalonia. I had called him mere seconds after my chat with General Khushrenada. Catalonia was still stationed near the kingdom, so he agreed to take the lad personally. I also had made up my mind _not_ to have the boy sent to Dermail. Both generals had agreed to this, but I had wanted to make it official and understood between the three of us. I may have ruined the small prince's childhood, but I was not going to take away his life. "The princess isn't up for travel yet, so leave her to me. It's probably best if they're separated anyway."  
     "He'll be safe with me," Alexander promised. "I'm sending him to my wife. You saw how close Anda and Eleanor are. They're staying together while Tretton and I are away. Dorothy can play with him, but I think he'll have more fun with Treize, Tretton's boy. The lad's ten, but he hasn't hurt Dorothy yet while they play together, and she's only three."  
     I nodded and handed him Milliardo's things. "If Dermail finds out you and your cousin-in-law—and now your wife and her cousin—are harboring the little prince.... Well, I can only imagine how he'd feel about his relatives and their families. Your children are at risk."  
     He waved off the danger with his hand. "My father-in-law thinks we're dutiful soldiers and follow his every command; he thinks that even more of his precious daughter and niece. He doesn't like children much and doesn't spend much time with his own grandchildren until they're older. If he happens to see Milliardo (which I'll doubt he'll notice), we'll tell him he's a friend of the children. He won't recognize the boy, and if he somehow did, he'd figure they just look similar because his daughter would never take in a pacifist prince.  
     "If I were you, I'd be more worried about myself. With the children missing, he's going to suspect you've turned, and he hates traitors more than pacifists. If I were you, I'd disappear."  
     "Oh, I will."  
     "The sooner, the better," he said and readjusted Milliardo in his arms. "I should get going. I don't want him anywhere near this place when it falls. The Alliance is completely disregarding Romefeller this time, and who knows how bloody it'll get because of it." I saw him bite his lip to stop from continuing. He probably had had many disagreements over this already. "Get that princess out as soon as you can."  
     I nodded, and we parted ways. I never looked over my shoulder as I went back into the underground passage. I knew that would be the last time I ever saw Milliardo Peacecraft.

Getting Relena out of the country was harder than I expected. With the girl being sick, Katrina was extra cautious. Only the closest maids and the nanny were allowed to be with her, and there was no way I would tell Katrina about the plan. Since Ethan's death, she had clung to the toddler more than ever. There was no way she would let the child out of her sight for any reason. I wondered if she even noticed Milliardo was absent.  
     For two days I tried in vain to get close to Relena. Nicolo returned on the third day. He asked about Milliardo when he saw Relena was still there, but no one could answer him. I was not able to speak with him at all, neither privately nor publicly, and so I could not explain the situation. I never knew if he knew of the attack coming that day, but I was too anxious to care. I had to get Relena out of there.  
     Nicolo and Katrina had lunch together—Relena with them. I tried once again to get her through maids and ladies-in-waiting, but nothing worked! I tried to impress upon them the importance and the urgency of the situation, but they were somehow immune to the electricity in the air before the attack. I began to despair that for my arrogance in trying to keep one little grandchild with me, God was going to punish me by killing off the babe.

The attack happened just as dinner was getting underway at dusk. The sirens went off, and I could hear the sound aircraft, tanks, and mobile suits nearby. The bombings started soon after, and the marching of troops echoed through each hall. I made my way to the royal quarters. Before, I had been banned, but no one cared who went where in that chaos. I made my way to the nursery. It had already been hit, and the ceiling had caved in on top of a crib. The sight of blood caused my heart to stop, but when I investigated, it was only some poor maid.  
     I went to Katrina's rooms, but she was not there. It was then that I heard the shouting of soldiers followed by a barrage of gunshots. When the shooting had stopped, I dared to look into a nearby hallway. Katrina lay on the floor, a bloody mess. I cursed quite vividly and turned her corpse over. Still no Relena. I told myself that meant she was still alive somewhere, but a part of my mind said that if she was not dead yet, she was most likely hidden where no one would find her and she would die one way or another.  
     I ran throughout the palace carefully avoiding the brutes of soldiers that were invading the palace. Eventually flames and smoke started to fill every corridor, and I knew that I could not stay there any longer. Taking a few scared maids with me, I evacuated the palace and fled into the city.  
     The city was not much better than the palace—it was more chaotic if that were possible. The Alliance was still dropping bombs to add to everything. However, I was able to meet up with a couple of ladies-in-waiting who informed me that they had seen Lady Cassandra fleeing to the outskirts clutching Princess Relena in her arms. I ran immediately to the northern side of the city, for it was the only place Cassandra could have fled in safety. All other borders were blocked by soldiers.  
     I arrived in time to see Cassandra consent to being the former senator Richard Darlian's wife in order to hide herself and Relena from Romefeller. After a moment, I walked up to them and made my proposal. Lady Cassandra naturally refused, but Richard had a different view. Neither knew I was Relena's true grandfather, for they both thought—as the whole world does—that Nicolo was her father, and Richard certainly never knew I was a lower member of Romefeller, the spy that started the downfall. I did not know how much Cassandra knew of me, but I never brought it up. As a compromise, I offered to stay as a butler, which was a considerable demotion, and this pleased both. Lady Cassandra felt she could start a new life, and without my being over her, she could pretend that was how things always were. Richard thought I was a loyal subject of the Peacecrafts, and he was honored to have me stay with the princess. I was able to stay with my granddaughter, and throughout her life, I made sure to try my hardest to be in her life...always.

* * *

They sat in silence for quite some time. Both just sipped their wine, staring off into space, thinking about the past and what lay in store for them. Finally, Pagan broke the silence. "You never loved Richard, did you? Your heart remained with Alexander through all these years."  
     "Alexander and I knew we could never wed, and he knew I would never be his mistress, so we enjoyed every moment we could. The Dermails still practice arranged marriages; he had been promised to one of the duke's daughters almost since birth. Richard knew my heart stayed with Alexander but also knew I would keep true to him. We started to care for each other after a time, but it was never a passionate love."  
     "Nicolo saw the crush Richard had on you and assumed you felt the same way about him," he said softly. "I...never found out quite what happened to him that last day."  
     Mrs. Darlian shook her head. "I never knew either. Richard saw what happened, but he always refused to tell me."  
     "At least the children survived...."  
     "I knew Relena wasn't the king's."  
     "Excuse me?"  
     "I never told Richard, but I knew Relena's father wasn't King Peacecraft. A wife may have secrets from her husband, but a queen has no secrets from her ladies-in-waiting whether she likes it or not. I didn't know Katrina's lover was your son, and I never knew he died, but I did notice a change in Katrina." She put down her wine glass and looked Pagan in the eyes. "I'm sorry to hear about your son, and...I'm...sorry for how I've treated you over the years."  
     Pagan waved the apology off much as General Catalonia had waved off the danger posed to his family. "You're young. You didn't know. I must admit I didn't make it too easy for either of you."  
     She smiled a little just for a moment. "I'm not apologizing for anything else."  
     "I'm not apologizing at all."  
     They both turned as the television caught their ear. They were broadcasting Relena's speech again. Mrs. Darlian turned up the volume to listen again, and they sat in the dark room, drinking wine, watching Relena.

_"I wish to make an announcement to the entire world. As of this day, I, Relena Peacecraft, have taken on the duties as Chief Representative of the Romefeller Foundation. ..."_


End file.
